43 Days

 

 

7,514 days.

180,336 hours.

That’s about how long I’ve been a mama.

 

2 days.

That’s how long it will be before our firstborn ventures to Australia for 5 months to study abroad.

 

43 days.

That’s how long until our second born leaves home to go to college.

 

4,309 days.

That’s how long it has been since we adopted our youngest.

 

Just numbers.  Right?

 

Not when love runs deep.

Those numbers represent memories, love, pain, laughter, tears, joy, anguish, learning and growing, moments big and small.

The everyday days of the past 20+ years don’t seem so ordinary any more.

I’m a mother, and just like Mary, I treasure all these things in my heart.  They are like a gift to my consciousness, recalling a storehouse of memories at will.

Memories.

 

“I have 43 days until I go to college, Mama!”  she says, as she records all the exciting upcoming dates in her new planner.

43 days.

Her excitement is palpable.  This is what my husband and I have been preparing her for.  Preparing all three of them for.  To take flight.  To be independent.  To move on.

To move forward.

My heels find themselves digging in as if I’m being dragged to this finish line instead of sprinting exuberantly toward it.

I must continue to allow Your Spirit, Lord, to grow and change me for each new season.  Each new day.

Life is always changing; My second born and I discuss this.  You can’t keep anything just the way it is no matter how hard you try.

And that’s a good thing.

Change is inevitable and God is good.

Children need to grow up, to become independent, to make a difference.

Parents need to move on.  To shift some of their focus.  To remember what is most important.

My relationship with my Heavenly Father is of the utmost importance.  Above any other relationship.  His gracious Fatherly love is eternal and He knows me.

“I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb…”  (Jer. 1:5)

Just like my mama heart longs for time with my children, God longs for us, His children.  He loves so completely and so overwhelmingly.  His love is like ocean waves that continue to wash up on our shores.  Unrelenting.

As my children grow, Lord, give me grace and peace for their changing seasons.  Give me your strength and joy for each of my own seasons, especially where they are concerned.

Thank you, God, for life.  None of us knows how many seconds, minutes, hours, days or years we have here.  Help us make the most of it for Your glory.

– Susie Stewart

 

Photo taken by Susie stewart

 

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8 Comments

  1. melissafaithbodin July 8, 2014 at 2:20 pm

    Ahh, this is so beautiful Susie! Prayers for peace and strength as you weather these amazing and wonderful changes in your family. Sending love and hugs your way. ❤

    Reply

    1. Thank you, Missy! You’ve been through some major changes yourself recently. Praying for you, too. Love you, friend. ❤

      Reply

  2. Beautiful, Susie! I can really relate to this.

    Reply

    1. Thank you, Cindy. Yes, we’re both in about the same spot. Time has flown since our M & M days. 🙂 ❤

      Reply

  3. BEAUTIFUL thoughts, Suz, about your motherhood & your dear children. Reminds me of what Terry Taylor often used to say, “Man resists change, but God requires change.” Yes, we’d love to hold on to the past, but change is God’s doorway to our greater growth in his love & faithfulness. I know you will all keep growing in amazing ways. Love u. Ruth

    On Tue, Jul 8, 2014 at 7:47 AM, Susie Seeking Him wrote:

    > Susie Seeking Him posted: “7,514 days.180,336 hoursThat’s about how > long I’ve been a mama. 2 days.That’s how long it will be before our > firstborn ventures to Australia for 5 months to study abroad. 43 > days.That’s how long until our second born leaves home to go to > college. 4,309 da”

    Reply

  4. Thank you, Ruthie. Great quote! I like yours too – “Change is God’s doorway to our greater growth in His love and faithfulness.” ❤

    Reply

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