God in a Box

February 22, 2015January 13, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 5 Comments

You have Him wrapped up tight, don’t you?

In a box

of your own design

of your own size

of your own weight, height, depth.

He fits, doesn’t He?

Fits in your constraining box.

Of course He must fit, right?

He must fit, because you get to choose….

When to bring Him out,

when to acknowledge Him,

when to worship Him,

when to listen to Him,

when to take advantage of His power.

As if He were a genie

at your beckon call.

It is surreal to try and imagine

GOD in a box.

If there ever was anyone who didn’t fit

in a box

it is Him.

But we try to do it, don’t we?

We try to just bring Him out of that box

on Sunday

when we are afraid

when life is caving in

when we walk through the valley of the shadow…

What would we do with a God

who could fit in a box?

We would manipulate Him

to do what we want

We would keep Him in there

when we didn’t want Him to see

our sin

our choices

our mediocrity.

We would not respect Him.

Because He would be a God

who could be placed in a box.

Relegated to a list.

Put on a shelf.

But don’t be fooled.

If anyone is in a box, it is the one who tries to put God there.

He is trapped and confined

by his schedule

his sin

his choices

his lack of vision….

of THE GOD

who is in all

over all

Alive

Infinite

Uncontainable

Un-boxable.

For the one who is wise

God will not be able to be contained

in your mind

or on your list

or in your box.

He is so big and so all-encompassing

and so lovingly piercing

that you will know Him

in every part

in every corner

of your life.

And you will worship Him

during any moment

in every circumstance

with love in your heart

for God

Who cannot fit in a box.

He wants your everything.

Are you willing to give it to Him?

Or do you still think He fits neatly and you get to choose?

– Susie Stewart

…one God and Father of all,

who is over all, in all, and living through all.

– Ephesians 4:6 (NLT)

Ambassador

February 11, 2015January 13, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 2 Comments

Home.

It’s somewhere I’ve never been.

Amazing really.

That I long for this place.

That there are people I love there.

And I want to spend time with them again.

But I am here.

You put eternity in my heart, God.

And when I look to the sky

and the clouds part

it’s almost as if I am trying to see

Home.

Where I truly fit in.

And feel completely fulfilled.

And there is no pain.

And there is no feeling lonely

for home.

You tell me that I am a citizen of heaven.

I believe You.

Because You are first in my heart

and I trust You when You say

that you have prepared a place for me.

I am a citizen of another place.

Let me live as if I truly believe it!

You, Lord, made me Your Ambassador.

Your representative citizen of heaven

here in the world I was born into.

The world of humanity.

The world that sometimes feels like home, comfortable and safe.

But I know better.

My promised home is perfect.

Imperfections abound in my temporary home.

That’s why I am an Ambassador.

An Ambassador to bring reconciliation

between God and people.

I’m calling out to those who are weighed heavily

with those imperfections

to accept His invitation!

to come home.

He calls all of us from beyond,

and in our hearts.

Will you embrace this earthly home

with everything you have to give?

Or choose a perfect home

swept away to its streets of gold

in the twinkling of an eye

on the day of God’s choosing?

I embrace that which is beyond what my human eyes can see.

For I am seen.

And I am His.

And He will call me
some day

Home.

– Susie Stewart

Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.

– 1 Corinthians 13:12 (NLT)

We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.

– 2 Corinthians 5:20 (NLT)

…He has planted eternity in the human heart…

– Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NLT)

Photo taken by Susie Stewart

Thoughts

January 10, 2015January 13, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 2 Comments

I went on a hike.

It was my goal to reach the bench,

to climb the hillside path,

to see the sunset.

I talked to God most of the way.

And thought about how I had failed….

Angry words had been expressed, never to be inhaled back in.

Loved hearts hurt.

And I was disappointed

in my decisions

in myself.

And I whispered confessions

to my patient Lord,

coming out in tired, hiking, breathless words.

And I reached that bench

but felt the urge to keep going

on this snowy, muddy path.

And so I continued upward

and reached another bench

as the sun went behind the mountains to the west.

And I was tired of treading in the mud

but had to keep going

to continue to process with God

the inevitable consequences of my loose tongue and poor choices.

When I reached the third bench

I stopped.

And I saw that the path had ended

with a gate.

And as I pondered the end, I said to God sadly,

“I’m at the end of ME!

I’m so over SELF!

I surrender all to You once again, God.

Please forgive me.”

And I finally sat down

at bench number three.

My eyes took in the majesty,

the beauty,

the splendor

of the mountains so far away

illumined with evening hues.

Those grand mountains,

unmovable but changing with light leaving.

And I still chose the heaviness of guilt.

And I pleaded, ‘Lord, please speak to me. I want to hear Your voice.’

With comforting tone and loving presence,

I heard in my mind,

“I have whispered your name through generations.”

I gasped.

Tears flowed.

HIS words.

Words I could not have imagined on my own.

He thought of me?

Way before I was born?

He, God, spoke my name?

I was overcome.

Alone in my regret,

He met me there

with loving words

when I had chosen the opposite, time and again.

Undeserved love.

Unmerited forgiveness.

I had brought a shadow to His light,

but here on this third bench at the end of the path

He reminded me

that He is love

and He is mercy

and He is grace

and He is Teacher

especially in the aftermath of careless mistakes

and most of all,

unconditional love reigns.

Heading back down

before the sunset turned to darkness

my burden was lighter.

The climb,

the end of the road,

the voice of faithfulness —

all worth the journey.

Now it was time to seek wronged hearts,

humble myself,

do better,

and learn on this journey.

And I was thankful to find

that the same forgiveness I received on that hike

is the same forgiveness

that I was met with

by those offended.

Light begets Light.

– Susie Stewart

O Lord, you have examined my heart
and know everything about me.
You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do.
You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, Lord.
You go before me and follow me.
You place your hand of blessing on my head.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too great for me to understand!
I can never escape from your Spirit!
I can never get away from your presence!
If I go up to heaven, you are there;
if I go down to the grave, you are there.
If I ride the wings of the morning,
if I dwell by the farthest oceans,
even there your hand will guide me,
and your strength will support me.
I could ask the darkness to hide me
and the light around me to become night—
but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.
To you the night shines as bright as day.
Darkness and light are the same to you.
You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed.
How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
They cannot be numbered!
I can’t even count them;
they outnumber the grains of sand!
And when I wake up,
you are still with me!

Psalm 139:1-19 (NLT)

Photos taken by Susie Stewart

The Point

January 5, 2015January 5, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 4 Comments

So that was the point.

The point of the difficulty.

The point of the suffering.

The point of the disappointment.

The point of the pain.

To know You.

I miss that sometimes. I think it’s all about me and what I’m supposed to learn about myself.

But really, it’s not much about me.

It’s about You, God.

It’s all about You.

And the great lengths You go to to draw us near to Your side.

My life is to love you with abandon, and to bring You glory.

That includes the pain, the brokenness.

Life,

minus the pain,

equals….

…not learning of Your closeness to the brokenhearted.

…not hearing your comforting tone.

…not realizing that You are the only true faithful One.

…not knowing that you are the Friend that sticks closer than a brother.

…not experiencing Your timely providence.

…not depending solely on You.

….not following Your gentle lead as Shepherd.

…not knowing the depths of Your love.

…not witnessing Your awesome power.

…not feeling Your arms around me.

…not knowing what it is to be more than a conqueror through You.

…not learning that You are completely trustworthy.

…not having awareness of the joy of obedience.

…not learning of Your unconditional love.

…not experiencing Your healing touch.

…not grabbing Your firm grip.

…not being changed by Your forgiveness.

…not seeing Your Kingdom here on earth.

…not worshiping You with tears.

…not being able to relate to the pain You endured for me.

You, my God, took my knowledge of You

and turned it into my experience of You.

You took what I knew in my mind,

and filled my heart with it.

Job, man of many a trial, battered and bruised from the fight, said after his dark, dark night,

“I had only heard about You before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes.” Job 42:5 (NLT)

You will fill every wounded soldier that looks to You.

That wants to know You.

To experience

You.

– Susie Stewart

“When God places you in a challenging situation, take it as a signal that He will be glorified – and that you will come to know Him in a deeper way. Because He’s going into the challenge with you. And you’ll know Him even better on the other side….To know Him is the grand goal and adventure of life. Inviting you into more intimate fellowship with Him will always be one of His primary reasons for steering you in one direction or the other. Don’t just be listening to hear Him. Be listening to know Him.” ~Priscilla Shirer

“Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent.” John 17:3 (NIV)

Holy

January 3, 2015January 13, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 2 Comments

I find myself searching….

searching for words that come anywhere close

to describing You

God.

I repeat so many of the same descriptors

over and over

and over and over

and they always seem to want for more.

Wonderful

Amazing

Beautiful

Incredible

And You are all those things

and yet…

My mouth and mind get frustrated

that I can’t come up with more

to describe You and how much I think of You.

To worship you.

And then I remember

how in Your Word

it says that the the winged ones surround Your throne

repeating “Hoy, Holy, Holy…”

over and over

and over and over

A reverence

An awe

A repetition of what and who You are.

Holy

Sacred

Perfect

Righteous

And I think about the repetitious worship

of the mysterious ones in heaven

and it seems to me

that there just aren’t enough words

to describe perfect Divinity

to ascribe perfect worth to You

and we repeat and we repeat

for all eternity

and our minds are blown

trying to fathom

You.

Holy God.

Holy

Holy…

– Susie Stewart

…I saw the Lord. He was sitting on a lofty throne, and the train of his robe filled the Temple. Attending him were mighty seraphim, each having six wings. With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they flew. They were calling out to each other,

‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of Heaven’s Armies!
The whole earth is filled with his glory!’
Their voices shook the Temple to its foundations, and the entire building was filled with smoke.

– Isaiah 6:1-3 (NLT)

…I saw a throne in heaven and someone sitting on it. The one sitting on the throne was as brilliant as gemstones—like jasper and carnelian. And the glow of an emerald circled his throne like a rainbow. Twenty-four thrones surrounded him, and twenty-four elders sat on them. They were all clothed in white and had gold crowns on their heads. From the throne came flashes of lightning and the rumble of thunder. And in front of the throne were seven torches with burning flames. This is the sevenfold Spirit[b] of God. In front of the throne was a shiny sea of glass, sparkling like crystal.

In the center and around the throne were four living beings, each covered with eyes, front and back. The first of these living beings was like a lion; the second was like an ox; the third had a human face; and the fourth was like an eagle in flight. Each of these living beings had six wings, and their wings were covered all over with eyes, inside and out. Day after day and night after night they keep on saying,

“Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God, the Almighty—
the one who always was, who is, and who is still to come.”
Whenever the living beings give glory and honor and thanks to the one sitting on the throne (the one who lives forever and ever), the twenty-four elders fall down and worship the one sitting on the throne (the one who lives forever and ever). And they lay their crowns before the throne and say,

“You are worthy, O Lord our God,
to receive glory and honor and power.
For you created all things,
and they exist because you created what you pleased.”

– Revelation 4:2-11 (NLT)

Consecrate

November 5, 2014January 5, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 1 Comment

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting Him, He endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now He is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.”

Hebrews 12:1,2 (NLT)

Have you ever had times when the Lord was telling you to drop something, to strip yourself of it, to let it go? That you will be lighter, more free, less encumbered, more effective.

And yet…….

Ugh.

That’s where I am today. And have been. It has bee an actual mental, emotional, even physical struggle. I keep pulling back what I think I have already surrendered. Why have I been dragging my feet in the dirt?

Control.

Simply that.

My pride doesn’t want to give up control.

I want to effect the outcome.

I want to manage this.

I want.

I want…..

In the book of Joshua, chapter three verse five, it says that Joshua told the Israelites, “Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the Lord will do amazing things among you.” God has been reminding me of this verse a number of times recently.

He has been speaking.

I’ve been hearing Him.

And I’ve been… well, I have not been allowing the Holy Spirit to permeate every corner, to consecrate my faith walk.

That would take complete surrender.

Not surrendering is so exhausting.

It’s like running the race in your coat and snow pants.

That sin, that extra weight that trips us up, its heavy.

Stripping ourselves of that weight, consecrating ourselves before our Lord, is essential for running with endurance.

“Tomorrow” God is going to do something amazing!

How can that be if I’m caught up in yesterday?

My surrender of the “high places” needs to happen today.

It’s not to be saved for later.

Today.

“They worshiped the Lord, but they also appointed all sorts of their own people to officiate for them as priests in the shrines at the high places……..Even while these people were worshiping the Lord, they were serving their idols.” 2 Kings 17:32 & 41

These things that we hang on to, the things that gnaw at us, they become idols we are refusing to give up.

Focus is blurred.

Something else in view. We are straining to see God around “it”.

“Because of the joy before Him, He endured the cross…”

Jesus surrendered. God’s Son endured and took upon Himself that which we want to blindly hold in our tight little fists.

He surrendered and “tomorrow” held amazing things!

He conquered death. And purchased my freedom.

We run with endurance by fixing our eyes on Him.

Not the past.

Not our struggles.

Not other people’s actions.

On Him.

He is the Author and Finisher, the Initiator and Perfecter of my faith.

Time to throw it off.

I much prefer running without the extra weight.

– Susie Stewart

Able

October 28, 2014January 13, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 2 Comments

Your Glory —– Untamable

Your Sacrifice —– Unthinkable

Your Pain —– Unfathomable

Your Determination —– Unstoppable

Your Love —– Unquenchable

Your Redemption —– Unalterable

Your Timing —– Undeniable

Your Peace —– Unbelievable

Your Purposes —– Unbreakable

Your Authority —– Unanswerable

My Sin —– Untraceable

My Joy —– Unspeakable

My Life —– Uncontainable

– Susie Stewart

But Christ came only once and for all time at just the right time to take away all sin by sacrificing Himself.

– Hebrews 9:26 (NCV)

Barabbas

September 30, 2014January 5, 2016 / Susie Stewart / Leave a comment

“Give us Barabbas!” you shouted.

Give us the criminal.

Give us the filth, the vice, the darkness.

Give us what we want.

We choose him.

Hearts are dark.

The Light is standing right there.

He is ready to surrender His very life for you.

And yet you say, “Away with this man!”

You want to hold onto dark and give up the Light?

You want to eat from the trough and forego the banquet table?

Just give us Barabbas.

We want to stay down here in the mud, in this pit, in this pain.

We want to stay in rebellion.

In pride,

In moral decay.

In depressive thoughts.

In distraction from the Truth.

Away. The Way, The Truth, The Life, is led.

To ridicule.

To torture.

To death.

To what seems like a snuffing out of the Light.

Light, though, will not be snuffed.

It penetrates darkness.

It draws you in with its warmth.

It is hope.

Jesus died.

So did Barabbas.

Jesus burst out of that grave, conquering King!

And why did we choose Barabbas again?

Oh yeah, we wanted the world, the dark, the muck…

When we could have had eternity.

When we could have had the Light.

There’s still time.

Don’t choose Barabbas.

– Susie Stewart

Matthew 27:11-26

Meanwhile Jesus stood before the governor, and the governor asked him, “Are you the king of the Jews?”

“You have said so,” Jesus replied.

When he was accused by the chief priests and the elders, he gave no answer. Then Pilate asked him, “Don’t you hear the testimony they are bringing against you?” But Jesus made no reply, not even to a single charge—to the great amazement of the governor.

Now it was the governor’s custom at the festival to release a prisoner chosen by the crowd. At that time they had a well-known prisoner whose name was Jesus Barabbas. So when the crowd had gathered, Pilate asked them, “Which one do you want me to release to you: Jesus Barabbas, or Jesus who is called the Messiah?” For he knew it was out of self-interest that they had handed Jesus over to him.

While Pilate was sitting on the judge’s seat, his wife sent him this message: “Don’t have anything to do with that innocent man, for I have suffered a great deal today in a dream because of him.”

But the chief priests and the elders persuaded the crowd to ask for Barabbas and to have Jesus executed.

“Which of the two do you want me to release to you?” asked the governor.“Barabbas,” they answered. “What shall I do, then, with Jesus who is called the Messiah?” Pilate asked.

They all answered, “Crucify him!”

“Why? What crime has he committed?” asked Pilate.

But they shouted all the louder, “Crucify him!”

When Pilate saw that he was getting nowhere, but that instead an uproar was starting, he took water and washed his hands in front of the crowd. “I am innocent of this man’s blood,” he said. “It is your responsibility!”

All the people answered, “His blood is on us and on our children!”

Then he released Barabbas to them. But he had Jesus flogged, and handed him over to be crucified.

Luke 23:18

But the whole crowd shouted, “Away with this man! Release Barabbas to us!”

John 18:40

They shouted back, “No, not him! Give us Barabbas!” Now Barabbas had taken part in an uprising.

Knowing

September 16, 2014January 5, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 6 Comments

Be still and know that I am God.

Be STILL and know that I am God.

Be still and KNOW that I am God.

Be still and know that I am God.

Be still and know that I am GOD.
In the stillness of regret, of loneliness, of disappointment, of pain

In that stillness that doesn’t feel good

Be near my Lord.

Let my stillness not be wrought with discontent

Let it be stillness of abiding

Let it be stillness of knowing

Let it be stillness of observing, and tasting, and resting assured that you are God.

May this not be a stillness of mind wanderings and worthlessness

May I be still and know that You are God.

Therein lies my contentment.

Therein lies my fullness.

Therein lies my peace.

Stillness and Knowing

Before God Almighty, Loving Savior, Reigning King.

– Susie Stewart
Pslam 46:10 – “Be still and know that I am God.”
Psalm 37:7 “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him’’
Zehariah 2:13 – “Be still before the Lord, all mankind…”

Psalm 119:37 – “Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to Your Word.”

Mind The Gap

August 10, 2014January 13, 2016 / Susie Stewart / 5 Comments

You are there.

I am here.

There is a gap.

I cross the gap and I see you, truly see you.

And you live in extreme poverty

The walls of your home are mud and sticks

Your front door is a piece of torn fabric.

My door here…

Well it opens to a very large house

With too many rooms for the few people who live here

The echo of your voice heard in these large spaces

And your family, all of you, sleep on a mud floor in one room

And you don’t have a bed

And you are tired.

I’m tired too.

I’m tired of the huge gap between me and you

Between how I live and how you live.

That’s why I’m moving.

Out of this familiar and comfortable home

Where rooms are plenty and I forget….

How you are not comfortable

And you may only have one meal a day

And you are a servant to the relatives who took you in

When your parents died…

The gap is too large.

I want to mind the gap

I want to do more, and then more, and then more

And acknowledge that you are suffering.

Acknowledge that you are there.

And I am here.

And there is a gap.

Not just in distance

but in tolerance of suffering.

Just enough is not enough

Radical is what God is after.

Minding the gap

So that you will have a place to call home

With a bed

And a family

And I find joy and purpose and I am blessed

Because I know for you, life is better

Because life for me, has changed.

– Susie Stewart

Let us not love with words or speech, but with action and in truth.

– 1 John 3:18 (NIV)

Friends, please search your hearts for ways that you can love radically. There is still so much need in the world. God calls us to different things, but there is no doubt that He calls all of us to DO something. This has been a journey for me of how to live more simply so that others can simply live. I have been inspired by my daughter Nicole, who for so long has set an example of simplicity and a lack of materialism. The book “Crazy Love” has had a huge impact on our family and this sermon by Joshua Clemmons. No judgment cast on anyone else, just challenging all of us to find ways to do more.

http://www.trueimpactministries.com – a ministry that is minding the gap.

* “Mind the Gap” is a phrase that originated in London as a warning to passengers as they cross from a station platform to a train door.