Exile

 

Are you on an island?

Has life caused you to be isolated?

Is there an aloneness that is tangible in your heart?

Pain and suffering, change, betrayal, loss….

John was on an island.  He was exiled to the island of Patmos.  Christians were going through a time of persecution and those who held that Christ, not Caesar, was Lord, were facing hostility.  John was sent to Patmos as punishment for his faith.

In his exile, God showed up.

His eyes were opened to the realm of the supernatural, of things to come.  Imprisoned on an island, away from the people and places that he loved, the Lord of the future overwhelmingly revealed Himself and His plan to John.

The book of Revelation is so stunning that it takes my breath away at times!  The things written in this book, so distinct and curious, are a taste of the judgment and the wonder to come.  John was overcome.  He says, “When I saw Him, I fell at His feet as though dead.  Then He placed His right hand on me and said:  ‘Do not be afraid.  I am the First and the Last.  I am the Living One;  I was dead, and behold I am alive for ever and ever!'”

There was a point in my chemo journey when I realized that I was an exile like John.  On a much smaller scale, mind you, but I felt it nonetheless.  Because of the winter season, wanting to stay away from germs, and because of feeling bad physically, I was home most of the time over the course of a few months.  I was home, and I was bald.  While I was grateful for a warm home, it felt like the walls were closing in on me at times.

God opened my eyes to my island.

What I did with my time came into sharper focus and I longed to be closer to God.

I determined that I didn’t want to waste my exile.

Sowing aloneness can reap growth.  Sowing aloneness can also reap self-pity, discouragement, resentment….

What I set my mind and heart on determines what I sow.  I know because I have sown both.

“Set your mind on things above, not on things on this earth,” God’s Word says in Colossians 3:2.

I have found that in exile, determination to follow truth and to follow hard after God take discipline.  It takes a “setting” of the mind.  Your mind and heart will be pulled away if you don’t.

“So let us come near to God with an honest and true heart. Let us come near with a faith that is sure and strong….”  Hebrews 10:22

My prayer for you is that you will draw near to God in your exile, and there He will share with you His amazing love and His undeniable truth.

– Susie Stewart

 

(photo of the island of Patmos courtesy of bibleplaces.com)

Listen

Deuteronomy 30:20 “…love the Lord your God, listen to His voice, and hold fast to Him.”

I want to hear Him.

Listening can be difficult at times.  Life gets loud and complicated.  But deep calls to deep (Ps. 42:7).

Earlier today my home was quiet.  I asked the Lord to speak through me as I typed my first blog on this site.  I listened with my heart and I spent much time bringing thoughts and Scripture together.

Everything I typed….disappeared.

No explanation.  Just gone.  As hard as I tried, I couldn’t retrieve it, from my computer or from my brain.

Big, big sigh.  This, my first blog on my own site, just vanished.

While I was drawing near to God, while I was listening, while I was absorbing….things took a turn.  This was not the plan I had.  I was going to click a button, publish those words, and there you have it.  But I just couldn’t make it work…

That’s what happened to me in life.  Life took a turn.  Things were going along relatively smoothly.  But then cancer.

I didn’t want to shift this way!  I wanted things to go along the way I envisioned.  Was life now clouded and dark and hard?  Would the good memories of joyful times just disappear, like my typed words, as if they hadn’t happened?  It really depended on my trust in the One leading me.

My Shepherd is Jesus.  I know His voice.

 “…His sheep follow Him because they know His voice.”  John 10:4

My Shepherd promises me that He works all things for my good.  He promises never to leave me or forsake me.  He promises purpose for my life.  I want His purposes to be mine.  (Romans 8:28; Deuteronomy 31:6; Psalm 138:8)

“Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.”  Proverbs 19:21

Following my Shepherd even when life takes a turn, that takes pliability.  Trust is key.  Listening in the midst of the noise is important, and can be difficult.

“Today if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts…”  Psalm 95:7

I have come through surgery, radiation and chemo.  Things are looking good at this point.  I will keep clinging and praying and listening.

As I bring this new blog to you, my friends, I will be seeking HIM.  I will be looking to bring words of wisdom, of encouragement, of real life.  I want to be pliable as I do it.  After all, I am following the Leader.

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By the way, in the middle of the night, after a bit of sleep, the first blog I wrote started coming back to me.  I got out of bed, typed it up, and it will come next time.  Things didn’t go the way I planned, but there was purpose in it.  After all, the blog above wouldn’t have happened if things hadn’t taken a turn……

– Susie Stewart

(My blog from the last 7 months:  www.mylifeline.org/susiestewart)